Image for post
Image for post
Source: Lyndsay Rush, Maggie Enterrios, Elizabeth Grey

Valentine’s Day 2021 is strange and so are my friends and I. Which is why we collaborated to create these Coronaversation Heart ‘curbside pickup lines’ in honor of the very strange times we’re living in.

At the (oh no) *heart* of the project was the hope to bring some levity to these dark times and ideate what kind of flirting and romance looks like under quarantine. (Psst: I firmly believe you can take a lighthearted approach to a topic without making light of it and that comedy and humor are a helpful form of healing.)


Image for post
Image for post
Image by Keith Johnston from Pixabay

While most of us have been dutifully participating in, ahem, intentional grounding, it’s impossible to ignore how many folks are behaving as though the coronavirus isn’t gaining yardage every day. Team players? Methinks not. And since scientific facts, catchy metaphors, and appeals to kindness haven’t worked, the obvious next step to get through to people is to become a COVID-19 referee and hand out football penalties. All you need are some yellow flags, a hefty dose of outrage, and a base-level understanding of American Football.

Too Many Men On The Field

This penalty occurs when you can tell from Instagram Stories that a group of more…


How do you show your partner that you care? For local girlfriend Jennifer Lush, it‘s as simple as stopping her boyfriend Craig midway through loading the dishwasher to inquire why he’s putting the bowls in there like that.

Jennifer asserts that these “li’l queries” come from a loving place and are “curious, not critical!!!” — aimed at helping her get a better grasp on why he continues to accomplish tasks in ways that deviate from how she would do it.

“At the end of the day, I just want to understand him…and why he would take 63rd when Briley Parkway…


Image for post
Image for post
Image Sources: 1 2 3

It’s fall — and I cannot emphasis this enough — y’all. And that only means one thing: pumpkin patch fashion!!!! Move over, ‘Spooky Season’, because while you’re decorating your porch with severed heads, we’re turnin heads! Out of our way football fans, cuz we’re not running plays, we’re runnin’ to Marshalls!

That’s right, it may be getting cool outside, but it’s getting HOT up in these fall outfit combos. Here are a few killer looks to strut all up and down Mr. Jenkins’ Pumpkin Patch this weekend even when he says, “Please, I’m begging you, buy something.”

Poncho

It’s hard to…


Fitness influencer Brynnly MacNamara (of the popular blog Bryn It to Win It) went astonishingly rogue this week when she posted a throwback photo on a Tuesday, not the traditional Thursday of #TBT lore. Her trepidation of this perhaps career-ending risk shone through in her caption that began with an apologetic, ‘I know it’s not Thursday, but I wanted to throw it back to the Biceps & Babes retreat in Tulum…”

According to Brynnly, her personal attorney is standing by in case there are any legal repercussions to breaking the social code of when to share baby pics or old…


With the ink barely dried on her birth certificate, newborn Kryssalyn Mhavryck Bryant-Maloney has obtained an attorney to sue her parents for libel, negligence, and breach of contract pertaining to her given name.

Despite being mere hours old, Kryss (the name she’s going by as the lawsuit plays out), claims she knew ‘with absolute certainty’ that being christened with a name like Kryssalynn Mhaveryck followed by a hyphenated last name would be future-crushing on every imaginable level.

When reached for comment, her attorney Hannah Jenkins (originally named Kimber [middle name: Leigh]) indicated that the trend of newborns suing their parents…


Standing out isn’t a matter of taste, it’s a matter of survival.

As a branding agency that specializes in brand personality—leveraging fun and humor as a core strategy to launch brands that snag (and keep) attention—we know firsthand how effective this approach is.

And we don’t just leverage humor because it’s the most fun creatively, we do it because…science. Yep, it’s is more than just comical, it’s chemical. It’s also other ‘c’ words — no, not that one — clever, calculated, converting, cheers-worthy.

Humor in branding is more than just comical, it’s chemical. It’s also other ‘c’ words — no, not that one — clever, calculated, converting, cheers-worthy.

When served up properly…


Some people marry for love, some people marry for money, but me? I’m getting married solely to start a joint Facebook account with my husband.

I get it, it’s frowned upon to see marriage as a means to an end — but nothing is more titillating, more jarring, more confounding than two fully-formed, adult human with so little trust for one another that they share a single Facebook account.

And I’m not gonna apologize for wanting a piece of that.

I’m done with independence and a strong sense of self. BORING! I want to get notified when a friend shares…


During these unprecedented times, we’re all doing what we can to stay sane. Some of us are baking bread, some of us are puzzling, some are learning a new language, and me? I took up running…my mouth! I know, right? I was surprised at how much I loved going on long, meandering rants and now I even look forward to running my mouth every single day.

Who would’ve thought!

I mean, like anyone, I sporadically hop on the rumor mill a few times a year, just to stay limber. …


Image for post
Image for post
Image Source

Soy Sauce

I’m not here to make friends, I’m here to make stir fry.

A 28oz Sriracha

If you cant take the heat, well honey, the kitchen’s closed.

Near-Empty Mustard

I was born with a silver spoon in my mouth. Literally.

Worcestershire Sauce

Some say I’m overpowering. They’re not wrong.

A Salad Dressing I Hate

I’m a great dresser and I don’t mind being tossed around.

Cornichons

I may be small, but make no mistake: I’m a big dill.

BBQ Sauce With Crusted-Over Lid

I like being on top….of the world and pulled pork sandwiches.

Tartar Sauce

I’m always up for a caper.

(1) Newman’s Own Ranch Sleeve

What can I say? I’m a to-go getter.

Vegan Mayonnaise

I’m not an animal, but I party like one.

Horseradish

You can’t…

Lyndsay Rush

Comedy writer, Creative Agency CoFounder, Copywriter, national treasure.

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store